another sunset

Hehe, look what a wonderfull view I have from the window of my bathroom. Seems like I live in Colorado or something. The bathroom doesn`t worth anything but the view...
Anyway, I`m happy I found a good picture for my new article. Lately I have lack of inspiration, materials to write about and pictures as well. You can see that I am not very efficient.
Today I made a good training. As I say good I mean that I felt good but the training doesnt worth a thing. I run like a phlegm - slowly, apathetic, almost lethargical. Like a snail. I`m running one killometer for more than 6 minutes and this comes to show that in general I dont run at all. But I just cant move any faster. And why should I? Who cares if I do? What is the sense of that? My body just gives up after my mind did it. I`m sure about that. My pulse is not even getting any higher than 170-176. This is nothing. Absolutely nothing! Like half of my body is asleep, not working at all.

I do not find physical or emotional reason to do anything at all. I give up. I dont want to play, as kids say. I quit.

Do you know that theory claiming that the world has million dimensions and everything happens million times but on a different levels? That life goes on and on million times one after another but probaly with a slight differense, and the space is organized like the pages of a book? And people want to jump from one dimension to another? Do you know that theory? Hope you do, because I`m not very good explaining physics and science but anyway, sometimes I think that I live on the wrong page. Not to mention that even the chapter may be wrong... but I feel that something is kind of weird and unfamiliar, and like it`s fine in general, and life is good but... isn`t it the wrong level I live in? Something little but significant is disturbing my conscious and even my body, because every time when a doctor or a dentist, or a hairstylist, or someone like that tries to make any sort of intervention on me, something goes really wrong immediately. Like when you meddle with two forks in a plugged in machine and any second from now you will be striked by the electricity. The point is that these fellows here have absolutely no idea what they are doing, like they think that everything they do is fine and correct, like it`s written in a manual book to do exactly this particular action ( to meddle with two forks in a machine plugged in). In the page (world) they live in actually, this is exactly what they should do and they will repair the machine ( my body). BUT on my very page (world) this very particular action leads to an immediate electricity stroke but with the simple detail that not the person, but the machine (my body) gets broken and stroked. Do you understand what I mean? At first sight, my body is like the other people`s but in fact, it is very much not. Like my cells are organized in a different way. Like people`s bodies are organized on the page (world) I should live in. Do you get the idea? People from page 34 and those from 35 are absolutely alike with a very slight gifference. From 34 and 36 we can find distinctions, if we do our best to search for one, but people from page 34 and 37 for example, are already very different and you can see it with naked eye. People from 34 and 444 are uncompatible. It`s on the principal of accumulation, like heaping slight differences one after another, you can graduate a huge difference. Lets say I`m from page 37 and this world here is 34. We are different as the thickness of two pages ( 1/3 from the millimetre) but this distinction causes a lot of damage to me and my body in the daily round.


Do you got the idea of my misery and where it comes from? I am not complaining from anything but ... please let me get out of here!!! I am gonna die very soon if everything goes like that in future. I am not joking! It`s like to put a riverwater fish in a saltwater. It`s a fish and it`s a water but the fish is still going to die...

This article itself is a piece of evidence, that I am off my mind. Only a sick brain can give a birth of this...