twelve

Is it really only 12 days to go till I see you again? And do you know its 12 days since we started our new life together? Amazing, isn`t it? I call this day the "First day of the rest of my life", but I guess it`s just the selfish version of the more correct- "The first day of the rest of OUR life". There is no more me, its only us... It`s the greatest feeling ever, I guess thats why people get together in comunities, teams and any sort of groups. Just because it`s bad, bad, bad to be alone! All right, "vorfreude", lets make a deal- let we both do the possible and the impossible, so that next year in this blog to be written something really good, something about the happiness, the beautiful life and... us. Together. 12 months and 12 days after we started. And if it happens not to be good what I have to write than, I only pray that we will be at least much wiser and experienced in this dificult challenge- to set two lonely souls together. But I know it will be all right, because I know you wont give up on us. And I wont too... That`s all that matters.

The theme I wanted to work out today is "my favourite literature autor". Sounds like in school, a? I just want to insert here that literature was my very, very favourite subject in school. Yes! Everyone hated it, everyone! But me. So there is no wonder I still feel much different from all the rest, 8 yrs. after I graduated. Anyway... No, I have to do something- I want to say big "Thank you!" to my both literature teachers- first Viktoria Varlinkova, my teacher from 5th to 7th grade and Iordanka Popova, my teacher in the High School. I thank them, because these two women (very different from each other, by the way), despite of the times and ALL the rules and the anticuated methods for teching which still exist in the most Bulgarian schools, saw the tallent and the difference in my silent, speechless eyes and gave me all the freedom to ... write. To write whatever I decide. After that, they read it and ... stay speechless and silent just like I was. They couldn`t say a thing. Nothing. I dont know the exact reason for that, but I always dare to flatter myself, saying that their numb reaction was a result of my shocking and extremely alternative eyesight of the world. I am still the same, but the good teachers are gone.... Hopefully I found 1 or 2 very good one. I call them friends. And yes, my "Personal Jesus"- Jens ( he doesnt like to call him like that, but he is very busy now, so hopefully he wont read this;)) So they are the one I shower with my shocking and extremely alternative points of view about this world, life, nature, me, them... all, that most people dont even notice. Or just deny and reject. The easiest thing a human being can do.

So my point tonight is called Haruki Murakami, but because I already wrote an impossibly long article I have to stop and go on tomorrow or thirsday night. Sometimes I dont know what happens to me. Words and thoughts are overflowing from my brain and I cant stop them. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and it happens- like a flash movie in my head- thoughts, images, ideas... crazy. If I wasn`t so lasy to get up and record or type them, I should be nominated for a Nobel Award by now. I`m joking! ........ no, I`m not! Haruki is not lazy like me and here he is, already nominated! But he wrote his first novel on the age of 29, so I still have 2 yrs to figure out how on earth, the novels are supposed to be written?

to be continued...